Divorcing a Narcissist By Lori J Loesch

My husband is a major NARCISSIST!  I have been hiding my misery for 26 years.  He calls me crazy, whore, slut, cunt, stimely, that’s my step, adopted dad’s name and he knows how much I hate that name, so tonight he called me lori stimely, over and over again, and many more, in front of our kids. And then he says I’m crazy?  Yes, because he has driven me to it.  Who can put up with this kind of abuse, day in and night out for 26 years, and not crack?  I haven’t cracked, I’ve gotten stronger.  He has great qualities, he’s a great business man, but when it comes to being a loving person, he falls short.  

Tonight I exploded, this is what you get after 26 years of being put down.  I MUST be the strongest woman in the world to have survived him, his, brother, and our son,  (3 narcissists).  He again said I was nothing, He said ” she thinks she’s some great writer, she’s nothing.”  Now you don’t have to wonder why I have low self esteem.

If I can say one thing to young people today, especially sexually abused ones is, to never get married and have kids. Unless you go through extensive counseling, you’re not ready.  I’m not allowed to see a psychologist, he says they are trying to break us up.  No, they give me coping mechanisms, and he hates it.  

I saw an attorney, in December, and he said this is a toxic environment for my daughter.  He said he’d need 30 thousand dollars to get started because david will hide his assets, and fight me to keep HIS money, and that alone could take 3 to 4 years to get a divorce.  Trapped again, I can’t wait that long to get out.  david will make my life hell, and I don’t have any support for what he’ll do to my emotional state.  I have no one. No one.  It’s just me, my kids, his narcissist brother, and his alcoholic girlfriend, that he is forbidden to marry because david said he would be cut off from the business if he did.  david will not allow our son to move out because he’ll cut him off.  My son wants to leave, but can’t he’ll be without a job and money.  Who does that?  What father does that? david’s brother said that david’s been controlling him for 52 years, he has.  david says he’ s too immature.  Yes, because YOU kept him in his prison.  That’s where david wants us in a prison.  My son and I say that there is always a common denominator to our misery and it’s david.  

I have got to go, the beast is rearing his ugly head to our son.  We say that if dave is fighting with me, he is nice to Jules. If he’s fighting with Jules, he’s nice to me.  It’s a messed up life.

  1. 3 Responses to “Divorcing a Narcissist By Lori J Loesch”

  2. This sounds like more than narcissism, it sounds like emotional abuse. You need to begin to take steps to protect yourself and your child.

    You sound like you are at the end of your rope, and while I’m not really sure if your post is really appropriate for this blog, I do hope you gain the support and confidence to seek the help you need.

    By AmyR on Apr 23, 2015

  3. yes, I know this was inappropriate for this blog, but I am at the end of my rope. I need a strong support group to get through this. I have been in touch with child youth services and I intend to find a place for my daughter, dogs, and cats to go. It will not be easy, but this live i have lived is not easy either. I long for the day where i will be able to live free and love my kids.

    By Lori Loesch on Apr 26, 2015

  4. I at first felt pity and didn’t want to leave him in his broken state, but now I see that it is all a put on to keep me here

    By Lori Loesch on Apr 26, 2015