Life in the Fast Lane — by Robin
For better or worse, I feel like I’m living life in the fast lane….literally.
Last week a friend told me about Mercury Retrograde because I felt like things just weren’t going right in a wide variety of ways.
Well….this week, the universe continues to speak to me, and if I don’t listen, I need to get my hearing checked.
I’ve had a cough for a couple of weeks now that is keeping me up at night. It’s a dry cough, so I presumed it was allergies, post nasal drip or due to throat irritation from acid reflux. My dad has a gastro doctor he really likes, who I’ve spoken to on his behalf on the phone, so I decided to make an appointment to see him.
He had a lovely bedside manner, and I felt very comfortable sharing my health history and what brought me to him. After taking notes, he said let’s take a chest x-ray. I haven’t had one in a number of years, so I thought fine, and didn’t expect anything.
I waited patiently for the results, and to my total shock, he told me I have pneumonia. I never had pneumonia before. How is that possible? Who knows!? But, it’s here. I don’t feel awful, and I always thought you would with pneumonia. He said not everyone is highly symptomatic.
So, I’m now on antibiotic and am so grateful that I didn’t dismiss my cough. Goes to show you really need to know your own body.
Earlier this week, despite being ill, I was committed to attend a moms night out dinner for Motherhood Later in NY. It featured speaker Elaine Lerner on the subject of ADHD (http://www.adhdparenttrainer.com/). It was a very informative talk, and was enjoyable to spend time with mom peers, some of whom I met for the first time.
When the talk ended, I went to my Kia rent a car (You might recall that last week I was in a car accident, so my Camry is now in the shop..to be returned mid-next week.) and put my bags down on the hood while I said good-bye to a friend. We had to move our respective cars because we were blocking someone else. We chatted a bit more and then took off for home, and when I got home, I had my pocketbook, but my tote bag was nowhere to be found. I went crazy looking under the seats and all over, and drove frantically back to the restaurant, but no bag was turned in. I had my date book in there (which is my life), notes from the dinner talk, flyers, a CD, etc. Luckily my phone and camera were with me, so it could have been way worse. I recognize.
On my way back home, upset and without my trusty tote, I decided to drive very slowly on the main road and I head past papers flying all over the lane. I pull over into a safe side area, jump out, and dodging cars, I pick up one piece of paper and see that it’s one of the Motherhood Later flyers from the meeting. I then look more closely and see my tote laying in the middle of the two way, four lane road, being run over by traffic. I scurry to grab it and look anxiously to see what is inside.
I lost the notes from the meeting, and my pens and card case were smashed, but other than that, the bag itself and other items were totally intact. (It was a lesportsac. Boy are those things made of steel. And, they’ve created a new line for moms. http://www.lesportsac.com/.)
I was in total disbelief that I even had this experience.
When I got home and looked back on last week, my tote bag incident, and now being under the weather, clearly it would seem that I need to get my act together in more ways than one.
What I came up with is this…
Slow down. Focus. Invite clarity into your life. Don’t we wedded to “stuff.” It’s just stuff, and we are not defined by our “stuff”.
Step back. Get off the spinning hamster wheel. It never stops unless you make it.
None of this is easy for me. I’m used to being a producer. And, being a mom has complicated that equation. I’m not entirely sure that we can have it all, though we/I try. It’s for sure a juggling act and one that can wear you out. (I wrote last week about being worn out.) My to-do list is full of both big stuff and minutia, and it’s a lot for anyone to handle. But, such is life, and it’s not unique to me. I hear so many talk about being busy, busy.
Part of it is time management. For me, another part is de-cluttering. My house looks like a bomb hit it due to our basement construction. But, in the next month or so, we will be done with it, and can work on inviting positive energy back into our home and lives. We will purge and organize and create a system that ideally works for all of us.
A cluttered home leads to a cluttered brain leads to potential incidents such as the ones I’ve been having of late. At least that’s my philosophy. I need to cut myself some slack. Take stock of what is truly important. Practice self-care. And, not feel guilty if I take a break. If not now, then when?!
A perpetually overtaxed mom isn’t good for anyone.