A Little Here and There – by Peggy Bogaard-Lapp

This week I had the chance to spend some time with my grandson, Corban. He’s 7, and in the second grade. What a difference he is from my ten year old daughter, in more ways than the obvious. He’s been raised by his single mom, her mother, her grand mother, his aunt, and by us for about six months when he was two. He is a shy one, and has a wonderful laugh that comes out when he lets his guard down. But that’s just it – he is always on guard. Each day this week he came home with me from school. I met him in the hallway at dismissal, and the first day his teacher had asked him who was picking him up that day. He replied, “that lady who comes into math class.” He wouldn’t tell her I was his “Oma,” his grandmother. The next day he called me “Miss Lapp.” By the third day he was comfortable with telling her he was going with Oma, and when I went in to the classroom at math time, he told another kid I was his Oma. The kid looked up at me and said, “you’re his mom?” “No” I replied, “his, Oma – grandma.” And I smiled at Corban, so he knew it was a good thing! Not a big deal, really, but to me it was. I realize he’s not sure of how he fits into our lives, and vice versa. We see him every time we get the chance, but it not enough to build a bond. But when we sat together on the floor at my house and read a book together, it was wonderful.

Tags: families, grandmother, later mom, school