Dear Motherhood Later — by Robin


I receive quite a number of letters from Later Moms who hear about MotherhoodLater.com and reach out to me via email. I have decided to periodically share select letters, with the permission of the moms. Some truly touch my heart, and I feel might resonate with others who became a mom at 35+.

This is a letter I received recently. I invite you to post a comment to the blog.

Hi.

I would like to add my two cents about being an older mother. It sure beats not being a mother at all!

Although I would have preferred to have children at a younger age, my first was born when I was 36. I was in great shape physically, emotionally, mentally, and financially. I consider my pregnancy a gift. I “enjoyed” and “experienced” ALL of that pregnancy. I placed no judgment on anything I felt. There was no discomfort, only an experience. Of course, my doctor told me that Lori would not be born early…a week later he said on the day I visited him, but she arrived only 12 hours later. Never having experienced labor, I thought I was in false labor and wondered how I would get through the real thing. I did have some difficulty then staying neutral and experiencing…..However, Lori’s birth was the most spiritual experience of my life.

Christine was born on my 40th birthday, a true birthday present. I remember the nurse in delivery looking at my card and scornfully saying to me,” Yu were born the same year as I was.” I smiled and replied, “Is that so?”

I savored every moment with both girls as they grew to young women.

People think I’m younger than I am, first because my children are younger, and I’m sure too because my attitude is younger. I feel 40 although my younger one is now 21I take care of myself, keep my weight down, and take care of my skin. The new 61 can be the old 45.

Motherhood has been a gift from God, and my daughters have taught me what love is in so many new ways. I consider myself very blessed.

By the way, I nursed both girls for some time and my weight just dropped off. I would recommend it for that reason alone, although the bonding was incredible.

Keep up your good work of supporting all moms and especially older ones. I was usually the older mom with all the young gals at events. My husband is 14 years older than I so you can imagine what looks we may have gotten. He’s 75 now, and we both look 10 years younger. Must have been the girls’ effect!

Hugs to all moms and their children,
Carole

PS — Here are some things that I have done for my children (and me).

1. A week after my children were born, I typed out my feelings and thoughts about their births. 8 pages. Now when I look back, it is interesting. I had forgotten so many of the details. They are special memories for my daughters to now view also. (I also wrote just prior to their births, but the details of their births was most interesting.) I included what I wanted for them in their lives.

2. On their birth date, I kept several newspapers so that they could see what the world was like on that day. Subsequent years, when I had too many papers, I just kept the first section.

3. When I had too many of their painting, projects, etc. to store, I began taking pictures of their “prizes.” Saved storage, but still had memories and pictures.

CAROLE THOMAS
RODAN + FIELDS Dermatologists

Independent Consultant
(530) 673-7911 office
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