A Simple Solution by Heather Bowles

Good Saturday morning, ladies (and gents, I’m sure there must be a few)!  You all post pics of your children on Facebook, don’t you? I certainly do. In fact, it’s one of my primary ways of keeping a photo record of my daughter. You may recall there was a series of incidents a few weeks ago that made me wary of sharing the album with others, but the album still exists. The few people who still have access to it are very trusted individuals, and as she is my first and likely will be my only child, I expect my friends and family share my happiness in her very existence, although on a less fervent level.

In fact, it has never occurred to me that my daughter’s pictures might be bothersome to anyone who sees them. To my knowledge, no one in my inner circle has tried unsuccessfully to have a child, or even necessarily wants one. All our family has had their children, and in my generation, I expect my daughter will be the last to be born to us. You can imagine my surprise then, to see this in my feed last week: http://unbaby.me/. This nasty little piece of work is a Google Chrome extension you can download to eliminate baby pics from your Facebook feed. How does it accomplish this, you ask? Get this: it replaces said pictures with “awesome stuff”, per the descriptor provided if you share it to your Facebook wall.

What kind of “awesome stuff”? Pictures of kittens and puppies, to start. Now, I don’t know about you, but my thought is, if you don’t like pics of babies, you might not like pics of baby animals. Not to fear though. You might get lucky and your friends’ babies’ pictures could be replaced with pictures of bacon. That’s right. I said bacon. Who was the person who posted this brilliant piece of troll fodder in my feed? None other than my younger sister. Gee, thank you. I really want to know that you’re replacing my daughter’s face with pictures of dead, processed animal flesh. The sentiment is overwhelming.

I have a better idea. How about people stop being scared of telling each other how they feel? If you’re one of blessed few who are allowed to see my daughter grow up in your feed, and it bothers you enough to download this program, just tell me the pictures bother you. I’ll fix it for you. In fact, I would hazard a guess that any parent, upon being told by a friend that they would rather see pictures of dead animal carcasses than their child’s face, once they’re over the hysterical laughter and realize it’s serious, will likely unfriend them and happily so. No one wants to share the most vulnerable part of their lives with people who can’t appreciate it and if you can’t share in the joy of a child born to a friend then you probably won’t care in the long run because you really aren’t a friend, are you? No more baby pics. Problem solved.

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  1. 4 Responses to “A Simple Solution by Heather Bowles”

  2. Does the browser add-on block baby videos?

    I like babies. They’re cute, and I have a warm happy feeling inside when I see my baby nephew’s photos.

    I like that FaceBook has a feature, where you can add people to the list, and choose to only allow people from the list to see the photos.

    Or if someone’s photos/posts that appear on your news feed bothering you, you can unsubscribe from that person.

    By Jason Pang on Aug 4, 2012

  3. Oh, I forgot,


    By Jason Pang on Aug 4, 2012

  4. Wow. Just…wow. There’s nothing like a mommy rant to get the day going! Might I suggest channeling your righteous indignation towards something that might actually make a difference in the world. Because this kind of stuff? Small potatoes.

    It sounds like your younger sister (who sounds awesome! bacon forever!) is trying to tell you something: you are oversharing, and you need to cool it. Maybe your younger sister wants to hear about YOU and how YOU’RE doing rather than see another hundred photos of your child. Maybe she’s struggling with infertility or pressure to have children and she’s tired of being faced with proof of her “failings” every time she logs into Facebook. (I’ve been there.)

    Regardless, get over it. Have fun with your child. Stop caring so much about what other people think. Share pictures or don’t. Unfriend people or don’t. You love your child–isn’t that all that matters, when you get down to it? Nobody else is obligated to care about your child as much as YOU do.

    And before you hurl the standard “you must not be a parent” at me: I am. I have a seven-month-old daughter. She’s amazing. But I don’t assume that everyone is as into her as I am.

    So don’t speak for ME by saying that “no parent” would want to be friends with someone who uses unbaby.me. Because I am a parent, and it doesn’t bother me in the slightest.

    By Bacon Mom on Aug 4, 2012

  5. Hi Jason! :) I’m not sure even if it would catch all the photos. I’m left wondering how it knows a baby’s face from anyone else’s, actually. Inquire with Google Chrome’s people and let me know what you find out.

    By Heather on Aug 4, 2012