Approaching Menopause with Positivity by Carol E. Wyer, author, Grumpy Old Menopause (Book Excerpt)
One of the most frightening experiences I had was my first panic attack, also referred to as panic disorder. I believed I was going to die from a heart attack. Because of the hormonal fluctuations occurring inside the menopausal woman’s bodies, several physical and psychological effects take place, and panic disorder may be one of them.Panic attacks are characterized by unexpected and repeated episodes of intense fear accompanied by physical symptoms that may include chest pain, heart palpitations, and shortness of breath, dizziness, or abdominal distress. These episodes are referred to as panic attacks and may resemble a heart attack.
Once I learned what was happening, I was prepared for the next attack and dealt with it much better. After a few more attacks, I could control them. They nearly always occurred at night, and I found making contact with the floor or a bedside cabinet would help. (Except when I made connection with the bedside cabinet using my head.) Deep breathing and reminding yourself that it is not dangerous will help.
Anyway, let’s move away from the possible symptoms of the menopause by introducing positive thoughts.
Lauren Bacall once said; “I am not a has-been, I’m a will-be.” We should feel that way too.
Positive thoughts will certainly assist you during this time. Researching for this book allowed me to discover many inspirational women whose attitude about ageing is to be admired and emulated.
You only need to open a magazine or read a newspaper to be inspired by women of our age: Lulu, Madonna, Michelle Pfieffer, Kim Basinger, Jane Seymour, Twiggy, Debbie Harry … the list goes on and on.
You should not feel that you have reached the end of your useful time or indeed your looks, even though there are days when you will inevitably feel demoralised. Ensure you look after yourself, then do or wear whatever you please. Take heart from the example of Dame Helen Mirren who hit the headlines when she sported a red bikini and revealed a figure that has to be applauded.
Looking at any one of a growing number of confident successful women who are enjoying radiant health and opportunities in their fifties and sixties, you cannot feel other than encouraged. Jamie Lee Curtis, who is a long-running actress and best-selling author, is a shining example of what you can accomplish when you love your body the way it is. She posed topless and did a piece on herself called Top Thighs to expose her imperfect body as a spoof on her figure during the filming of Top Lies.
Newspapers, magazines, and the internet are filled with stories from strong women who have transformed their lives following the menopause. There is an abundance of material and a whole host of websites to lift your spirits. In brief, there is little reason for you to feel too dispirited about the menopause. Embrace your body. Learn to love yourself and you’ll sail through the next few years with purpose.
There is further good news that once you have got through the menopause, periods will be a thing of the past and you’ll be able to wear white trousers once more. You won’t get hormonal headaches, monthly mood swings, or PMT symptoms. You’ll be able to enjoy sex without worrying about pregnancy and you’ll be able to maintain regular cycles of energy with much less fatigue.
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Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, “I’ve lost my electron.” “Are you sure?” The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive … “
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So what should you do with all that new energy? Take up pole dancing? That’s exactly what grandmother Sun Fengqin of Nanjing, China did. She decided to try the activity after watching several videos and having become fascinated by the beauty and athleticism of pole dancing. She soon became an internet sensation herself and if you Google her you’ll discover not only how youthful Sun is but what a fabulous activity this is.
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I saw a sheep pole dancing the other day. In a kebab shop.
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You need to possess a certain amount of flexibility to take up pole dancing, so alternative pastimes or activities that do not require so much energy and can help calm you include paining or photography. These are two of the most popular hobbies enjoyed by women. It is easy to see why, when each allows you to lose yourself in colours, nature and tranquillity.
Menopause is regarded by many as the gateway to self-recognition and is a wonderful time to take up challenges like this. It fuels the creative fires. Artist Helen Redman has embraced menopause wholeheartedly. She uses her art and teaching abilities to encourage women to “claim their age as a time of heightened creativity and spiritual growth”. Her work serves as a catalyst for others to explore the issues she raises, and for women to communicate their knowledge with one another. You can find out more about her from her website www.birthingthecrone.com. If you have any desire at all to paint or take up photography, this is probably the right time to embark on your new venture.
Carol is an ex-teacher and linguist who lives in rural Staffordshire, UK with her own Mr Grumpy. Author of eleven humorous books and numerous articles for websites including the Huffington Post, she has appeared on over fifty BBC radio stations, several international radio stations, NBC television and BBC Breakfast and Sky television discussing age-related subjects such as ‘Irritable Male Syndrome’. Last year she won the prestigious People’s Book Prize award for Grumpy Old Menopause. Visit www.carolewyer.co.uk.
Tags: carol e. wyer, later motherhood, menopause, panic attacks, perimenopause, womens hormones
