Living the Sandwich Generation

I am living the Sandwich Generation life…..and I don’t mean grilled cheese or pastrami on rye (though I could go for a good swiss melt one of these days). :)

My dad turned 89 on 9/2, and he’s been having health challenges. I feel like we’re in a medical circus. He’s going from doctor to doctor, incessantly describing his symptons,and thus far, has not received a diagnosis. I’ve accompanied him at times, and other times, have faxed him a list of questions to have answered. It’s been hard. I’m not sleeping well, and it’s constantly on my mind.

I’ve mentioned my situation to a few moms I know, and others have shared similar challenges with their senior parents. This is one of the big scenarios that can potentially come with parenting later in life.

You read a lot about balance when you become a mom, and trying to keep it all together in terms of your personal and professional life, if you are working. But, what’s equally as hard is finding balance in taking care of yourself when you’re caring for a young child, and trying to be there for an elderly parent. Nothing prepares you for this.

When I lost my mom a number of years ago, I sought out the support of a therapist, after trying a grief support group, which I wound up hating. I think it’s important to get out your feelings, yet you don’t want it to consume your life.

I want to be a happy mom and wife…..and person…..yet inside me is a little girl who is fearful about her own dad. I know I have to stay strong. I’m overdue for a foot massage. Doing something good for myself would be a welcome and needed relief.

I’m not thinking the worst about my dad, but you start to feel helpless at times when you rely on experts who aren’t readily coming up with answers.