Self Care In Order To Be Mother Bear by Wendy Sue Noah


I consider myself a Polar Bear Mom, through and through! After winning full custody of my five children, whom I lovingly call my ‘tribe’, my life and heart has been dedicated to these magnificent beings who came through me, and who are a part of me, in every way.

To put it lightly, it has been tremendously overwhelming raising five children by myself, not only as a single mom, but also without family here in Los Angeles! That’s right. No grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc., to help me out along the way. As you can only imagine, life became an accelerated blur of who needs what when, and a list of endless To Do items, all while making sure there was enough money for rent and other essentials!

I look back now, however, and cherish our uncommon and unpredictable life together. It has brought us closer, as a family unit.

Now my tribe is mostly grown up, well, no more little ones anyways. My oldest just finished her Sophomore year in college, and the next one is on her way to UCLA, as she graduates high school next week!

I will still have three left in the nest. My son and daughter are going into their Senior and Junior years in high school, and my baby is entering his last year of Middle School, 8th grade.

OK, so what does this all mean for me?! Well, it means that it’s FINALLY time for ME! Self care time! It’s been so long since that was a focus that I’m not sure how to go about it yet…

Every year, my tax refund goes to our family’s needs, and maybe a few desires. This year, however, I put some money away for me to take a Transcendental Meditation (TM) workshop, to help me be more relaxed and peaceful. More importantly, I chose to take TM because it is known to assist in the healing of PTSD, which has been a persistent challenge in my life.

Another somewhat new treat is that I allow myself to just relax more, to watch Netflix (Designated Survivor is returning with a new season tomorrow!) or Trevor Noah on YouTube, or to just take a lovely stroll through our local park.

When my daughter, Ocean, visited us from college a few months back, she observed me relaxed on the couch, leisurely watching TV. She approached me and commented on how wonderful it was to see me taking it easy like that, and that she doesn’t remember ever seeing me that way! Oy Vey, life has been over full, for sure!

This blog is quite paradoxical for me, because as a writer, I am always giving advice or offering some hard earned wisdom to my readers. Today, however, I am asking you for help! How can I better take care of myself, so that I can be a better mom and a better human being? What do you do for self-care (that is not too expensive).

With summer here, and my kids’ home, I will need to be mindful to take more breaks. In the past, by the end of the summer, I was a wreck due to all the activity and constant needs of my tribe. Now, they can mostly take care of themselves (even though I am still the only driver), and therefore, I can take better care of myself!

Please feel free to respond below with any suggestions or to share what works for you, and thank you in advance!!



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  1. One Response to “Self Care In Order To Be Mother Bear by Wendy Sue Noah”

  2. Enjoyed this piece! For me…practicing self care in summer is easier than year round as I adore our local pool and find it hugely meditative to be in the water, even if I’m just exercising or treading in the deep end. Otherwise, we have an affordable foot massage place in town that I love…don’t go often enough. We have a free meditation place in town where I have studied. On the most simplistic level, I put music on in the house that makes we feel good. On a slow weekend, I’ll binge watch Lifetime movies…but Netflix is all the better! Love the joy in your face in this photo…glad you are finding your happy places/pursuits.

    By Robin Gorman Newman on Jun 6, 2019