The Back Forty: 7 Essential Embraces to Launch Life’s Radical Second Half by Darrell W. Gurney (Book Excerpt)
The Lay of the Land
The Back Forty is a metaphor with a double meaning. It is a creative allusion to the second half of life, whether that second half will actually span thirty , forty, fifty, or even sixty years to come. It is also a reference to the farming term that means an uncultivated forty-acre patch of land with infinite growth potential that lies in a remote, back area of the farm.
Regardless of your particular age, you might call your first half of life “The Front Forty.” In that first half, you’ve experienced uniquely individual events with “stuff” happening to you that may have fostered a mindset of limitation shaping the way you see your life moving forward.
The Back Forty proposes that your Front Forty, first half of life, is all about research and development (R & D) and that you don’t, and even can’t, begin your true purpose until you’ve completed that R & D.
Further, The Back Forty asks you to embrace the concept that nothing that has ever happened to you could limit you in any way from being who you came to be or doing what you came to do in this lifetime. It asserts that your Front Forty has been absolutely perfect and exactly what you needed to have happen to put you on the path of your own unique, individual and radical second half.
This bold attitude—that absolutely nothing that has ever occurred in your life has any negative bearing on what is to come—is, indeed, a radical way to live. It is in direct opposition to society’s cultural conversation about aging and defies our conscious and subconscious belief systems, which have been shaped by a subtle, societal depiction of a bell-curve model of life. Society asserts that we gradually rise and supposedly peak at some point of “the best life has to offer us” (and that we have to offer life), and then we begin a slow decline. This viewpoint I call the “Down and Out Model.”
As we age, this “Down and Out” belief system forecasts that we become less creative, less vibrant, less bold, less risk-taking, less vital, less energetic, less entrepreneurial, less playful and all around less (not more) of who we truly are.
Problems abound with that picture. Inside that anti-climactic model, we are left disappointed and depressed when we realize, only after the fact, that our prime came and went without notice or celebration because we weren’t even aware of when we had supposedly “peaked.” A second problem is that the assertion is actually not true, but simply a bunch of BS (belief system) that covertly shuts down the greater Self-expression still available within us.
In contrast, The Back Forty says life is not an eventual decline but rather a shooting out the top in a radical, contrary “Up and Out Model.” The Back Forty asserts that all the creativity, vibrancy, boldness, risk-taking, vitality, energy, and playfulness of your past was only the warm-up and precursor to your future. . . with no final peaks assumed.
Mind you, I’m not simply throwing out warm and fuzzy motivational or Pollyanna ideas. What if, truly, your biggest game is still ahead of you, no matter what your age or what you’ve been through? That is exactly what The Back Forty way of thinking proposes, which many are beginning to align with. The Back Forty says no matter what you have or have not accomplished your growing number of years on the planet serve a function of staging rather than aging.
In the world of theatre, staging is the carefully planned preparation for a production. The Back Forty proposes that, just as in theatre, everything in your life is constructed and laid out for the big “play” yet to be performed. This dynamic is occurring continuously with yesterday supporting today and tomorrow. Using another metaphor, in the field of rocketry staging refers to the in-flight separation of sequential stages (pieces) from a multi-stage rocket. Each stage does its job to propel the rocket. Similarly, the more the previous stages of your life do their job and drop away, the higher you’ll fly. This Back Forty adventure will reveal that the past has done its job and now you can shoot upwards without any previously perceived weight.
I don’t know specifically, but I do know that it would definitely include your stepping up and into greater possibility.
For those of us coming into the second half of life with perhaps few victories or not much of a foundation under our feet (those of us truly beginning right now), the idea that literally anything is possible from here on out is hugely exhilarating. And, even if you’ve already amassed so many accomplishments and such abundance of wealth and satisfaction in your life that you don’t need to do a damn thing in your remaining years, what might be possible if you actually believed that the first half was simply a prelude to your truest Self-expression yet to come? Could you envision an even bigger game still to be played?
Radical thoughts! Thus, the idea of a “Radical Second Half.”
The Back Forty: 7 Essential Embraces to Launch Life’s Radical Second Half proposes that, to the degree that you can own and not be a victim to the serious and significant events and influences of your life’s path, you are freed up to move forward with more power, purpose and self-expression.
Darrell W. Gurney is an award-winning author, career counselor, business coach, and licensed spiritual counselor. He is the founder of TheBackForty.com and CareerGuy.com. The Back Forty: 7 Essential Embraces to Launch Life’s Radical Second Half draws upon over 30 years of supporting individuals in finding fuller self-expression in life, career, and purposeful direction, available for pre-order with valuable bonuses until Dec. 22, 2020 at https://pszr.co/IUQqF or https://bit.ly/backfortypreorder
Tags: aging well, darrell w. gurney, life's radical second half, living fully, midlife inspiration, the back forty
